Are you respecting your own boundaries?

We all have that still small voice and feeling in our gut that tells us when something is true “yes” or a “no.”


It’s the answer that arrives before any cognition has begun, before any rationalising, thinking or justifying has gone on.


This intuitive voice, this wise guidance of your soul is always there. You might say it isn’t, that you can’t hear it, but I know you can. Because I could hear it even at the times I was most out my body, when my ego was loudest, when I was totally disconnected.


It was still there.


The difference was I ignored it. I explain or excused it away. I let reason and rationality – or in some cases, deranged hope and illusion – take its place.


I still ignore my intuition at times. I ignore my intuition most often by following the equally as convincing and often much more powerful pull of obligation.


Have you ever had that experience “I know I need X but I feel as though I should do/be able to Y.” Perhaps you’ve made doing “X” mean you are selfish, or weak, or self-pitying, or pathetic, or grandiose, or dramatic, or uncaring…


Whatever it is, these ascribed meanings are just stories.


You will always be gifted that still small voice that tells you what is best for you to do in any given moment.


Ignore it at your peril.


I still do this at times. But less and less as I begin to notice what “stories” and “assigned meanings are most persuasive at making me ignore it.


For me it’s often about strength/capability/achievement – I should be strong/capable/good enough to do …


For me, this can show up as pushing myself past my energetic boundaries. Doing more because I think I can, because, underneath it, what I “do” somehow got linked to who I “am”, how good I am, how worthy. Rather than doing whatever it is, because it’s optimal, aligned, balanced or is in that sweet spot of “feeling good” aligned with my soul. Result – I crash before I realise I’ve over-exerted myself again.


But as I’ve unpicked many of these programs, the power of persuasion/obligation (aka the ego) has lessened and I am able to give myself more permission to listen to that still small voice of wisdom.


I’m slowly opening up the space to let it lead me, with awareness, breathing into my body and stepping back from the stories of my mind.


Now my day is dictated by me asking myself the question “yes or no” and honouring the answer that pops in.


Building with each honouring, trust in self and respect for my own boundaries.


So here are your Soul lesson activities for today:


1. Confused what your intuitive “yes” or “no” feels like? Take a breath into your body, drawing your awareness down as you do from you head, jaw, neck and chest into your heart and your belly. Think of a time you followed your gut and things worked out, remember that feeling of what that “yes” felt like. Then remember a time when your intuition said “no” – a red flag moment (we all have them!) and how that felt in your body. Note down the physical sensations eg. expansive, contractive, light, heavy, tight, exciting etc.


2. With each decision you face through the day, ask yourself “is this a yes or a no” and then simply follow it!


3. Ask yourself, what situations make it really really hard to say no? Who is it in relation to (you can repeat these questions with different people, starting with those that feel the strongest/most triggering/heaviest)? How would it feel to say no and instead do what you need with this person? What are you scared it might mean about you if you did? Write out the story. Notice who’s voice it might be in…say hello to your sneaky inner critic/saboteur ;)


4. Every time you follow your intuition, be aware, acknowledge yourself and be proud of yourself. Stay aware and notice how it plays out. Chances are, we tend not to regret the choices we make with our intuition (aka in alignment with our soul’s guidance) and when we drill into why we made the mistakes we did, somewhere along the line, we ignored the red flag warning whispered by that still small voice of our soul.


We can do life the short and easy way, or the hard way…all comings down to whether we’re listening and honouring.


Get out your own way and make it easy on yourself beautiful one x


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Photography by @elizabethstreeter