Stay in your own lane

Stay in your own lane - what does it mean?



Focus on examining your part to play in everything that exists in your reality


Life is a game of smoke and mirrors.


Us often projecting our subconscious/rejected/fragmented/deep seated beliefs and programmes onto the characters around us and others mirroring to us our energy, actions and decisions.


In this way, everyone can be our teacher. With the people showing up as the most displeasing, challenging, triggering and frustrating characters, often being the most important teachers of all.


Once we can accept that the villains of our life (on a human form level) may in fact be our greatest allies (on a soul level), our capacity for forgiveness and compassion is greatly expanded.


Ultimately, you can never control anything ‘out there’ (how other people act, react or feel – even less so what they think about us). All we can control is our actions, reactions and emotions.


Listening to our emotions and decisions is the key.


When calamity happens, it is the emotions triggered is us that allow us to access our own subconscious programmes, patterns, beliefs and ways of being that are misaligned with our truth and running collective programmes and conditioning. Those parts that need more of our love. Those parts that are stuck in trauma.


We can access it all, by the often misinterpreted gift, of someone being (for want of a better word) a bit of an asshole to us!


When we know this, gratitude can be offered, boundaries set and we can focus on what is truly empowering – getting to work on our inner world.


When we have the courage to set aside what the other person has done, in any falling out, disagreement or argument – and instead look at how it feels within us, what we make it mean about us – we are gifted the soul lesson of the situation.


Without addressing the soul lesson, the energy and pattern will simply continue on repeat manifest in the form of other people, situations and events in our external world.


Why?


Because you are a Soul having a human experience who came here to grow, heal, build wisdom and expand into the love that you are. Belief it or no, on a Soul level, you agreed to this spiritual ghetto, matrix game!


But life loves you and will keep gifting you the opportunity to learn and heal – in different forms – until you take life up on the invitation to look within and bring in more love.


Say someone is triggering you because they think you are a bad person, or a controlling person or a selfish person (insert whatever triggers you here). This will only resonate, because on some level, some part of you believes or fears this to be true. Maybe you were told it is as a child…


It is only in the meeting of that part of yourself (that inner child or younger version of yourself) in the acknowledgement of the assigned meaning or even experience or trauma that caused that pattern or belief, that allows the welcoming, the integrating of it back into the light, the truth of who you are.


Imagine meeting that part. Where are they? What do they need? How can, either in visualisation or reality, give that to them?


Life is the spiral path back to wholeness, a welcoming, again and again and again of those parts that we condemned, rejected, abandoned, betrayed, judged and made wrong at different stages of our life or lives.


Your Soul Work


Soo beautiful soul, the next time you are triggered, I invite you to turn your attention away from blame, on the other person, and back towards yourself and ask the following questions:


1. Why has this upset me (/made me angry/depressed etc.)?

2. What memory pops into my head/does it link to?

3. What am I scared this might mean about me?

4. In what ways am I trying to control the other person?

5. What does it mean that they think/feel/act as they do towards me?

6. What do I need? What part of me needs it (perhaps you identify with a certain age version of yourself that is most affected by this)?

7. How can I give myself more love?

8. What have I learnt from this? What pattern, belief or programme am I now will to release?

9. How has this experience enabled me to grow?

10. What boundary/need do I have with/for person going forward, now I have this new awareness.


I hope this helps you. Do let me know if these questions are bringing up a lot or your feel like you are getting stuck, caught or trapped in what’s coming up or in resistance.


Get in touch if you want to hear more or you’re ready to start our Soul healing work together.

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Photography by @elizabethstreeter